Every mother wants to be the perfect mother. I mean we all work hard and strive for the title of being the ideal wife for our husbands and ideal mother for our children. Honestly, I believe it is not an impossible goal. Just like any other goal you just have to work hard and never give up. Some of you are already there. Here are some signs that you have reached The Perfect Wife and Mother status.
1. You cook 3 meals a day, 7 days a week (no exceptions) always including protein, veggie, fruit while being, of course, organic and gluten-free.
2. Your hair is always flawless.
3. You please your husband sexually 7 days a week twice a day no exceptions.
4. You have never fallen asleep while your toddler was still awake playing on the bed.
5. You never sleep; you don’t need sleep.
6. You are able to carry all of the groceries, your purse, baby bag, and the baby because you have 8 arms. (Octo-mom)
7. You never sweat.
8. You never need bathroom breaks because you don’t pee or poop.
9. You were a size 2 before, during, and after pregnancy.
10. You are able to complete a 3K mud race and finish in top 10, sparkling clean, hair still in place, without breaking a sweat.
11. You have never gotten out of the car and forgotten your toddler in the car seat.
12. You have never made tuna salad and forgotten the tuna.
13. You have a perfect memory and never forget anything.
14. You find ALL of your husband’s jokes funny…yes, even the one he tells at every single party.
15. You are able to talk sports all day everyday, even during sex.
16. Your child never tells you “No”.
17. Your husband never tells you “No” to shoes and handbags.
18. Your child eats everything you cook.
19. Your toddler is never caught in public with snot running down his or her nose.
20. Your husband is never caught in public with a food stain on his shirt after eating tacos.
21. You never have headaches.
22. You have never allowed your child to watch mindless TV because you are always energized and ready to PLAY!
23. You work 40 hours a week and sometimes overtime so your husband doesn’t have to work so hard.
24. You are never moody.
25. You are mistaken daily for a high school student.
These are just a few signs that you are the PERFECT wife and mother. If you are not there yet keep trying; you will be one day.
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