25 Signs You Are The Perfect Wife and Mother

Every mother wants to be the perfect mother.  I mean we all work hard and strive for the title of being the ideal wife for our husbands and ideal mother for our children.  Honestly, I believe it is not an impossible goal.  Just like any other goal you just have to work hard and never give up.  Some of you are already there.  Here are some signs that you have reached The Perfect Wife and Mother status.image

1. You cook 3 meals a day, 7 days a week (no exceptions) always including protein, veggie, fruit while being, of course, organic and gluten-free.

2. Your hair is always flawless.

3. You please your husband sexually 7 days a week twice a day no exceptions.

4. You have never fallen asleep while your toddler was still awake playing on the bed.

5. You never sleep; you don’t need sleep.

6. You are able to carry all of the groceries, your purse, baby bag, and the baby because you have 8 arms. (Octo-mom)

7. You never sweat.

8. You never need bathroom breaks because you don’t pee or poop.

9. You were a size 2 before, during, and after pregnancy.

10.  You are able to complete a 3K mud race and finish in top 10, sparkling clean, hair still in place, without breaking a sweat.

11. You have never gotten out of the car and forgotten your toddler in the car seat.

12. You have never made tuna salad and forgotten the tuna.

13. You have a perfect memory and never forget anything.

14. You find ALL of your husband’s jokes funny…yes, even the one he tells at every single party.

15. You are able to talk sports all day everyday, even during sex.

16. Your child never tells you “No”.

17. Your husband never tells you “No” to shoes and handbags.

18. Your child eats everything you cook.

19. Your toddler is never caught in public with snot running down his or her nose.

20. Your husband is never caught in public with a food stain on his shirt after eating tacos.

21. You never have headaches.

22. You have never allowed your child to watch mindless TV because you are always energized and ready to PLAY!

23. You work 40 hours a week and sometimes overtime so your husband doesn’t have to work so hard.

24. You are never moody.

25. You are mistaken daily for a high school student.

 

These are just a few signs that you are the PERFECT wife and mother. If you are not there yet keep trying; you will be one day.

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57 comments

  1. aimee fauci says:

    Let’s not talk about #11. Oh my gosh… it was for less than 15 seconds but I was like ‘What am I missing?’… Oops.. It was early early in the morning.. before the sun came up… Kick myself in the butt.. ;-0

  2. Yona Williams says:

    LOL, this is too funny, especially: “You were a size 2 before, during, and after pregnancy.”, and forgetting tuna in the tuna fish (I’ve forgotten sugar when making sugar cookies before). And, ha @ the “You are mistaken daily for a high school student.”

    • SummersGroovyMom says:

      Lol, Okay!! I love your post “20 Ways to Have Summer Fun with Toddlers for Free”. I am going to pin. Thanks!

  3. eunkyungsuh says:

    Freaking awesome. LOL Mine is: I’m perfect because I have 2 different size boobs from nursing my child who’s been gone for 4 days. YKWIM! LOL So I’m giving Dolly Parton a run for her money! I guess I’m going to regret saying this but I wish I had small boobs. haha. Thank you for an uplifting post.

  4. Jeanna McMicking says:

    haha! I was reading this thinking.. good lord. I am a very NOT perfect mother.. lol. You should look up an old article called “the good wives guide” it will blow your mind. It is kinda like this but for real, from the 1950s. :)

  5. Mama's Happy Hive says:

    You hit the nail on the head with this one! :) I really liked the one about finding all your husband’s jokes funny! LOL! :) I am glad I am not the only one… ;)

  6. Bonnie says:

    Laughed so much! How about your children never touch anything in a store causing you to buy unnecessary things that might break. No perfection here.

  7. Hope @ Nanny Shecando says:

    Hah, I love it! What with social media and the ability to photograph every great moment and make it seem as though you’re nothing but perfect, this is a great little reminder that it’s not always roses!

  8. Jeanette Mays says:

    lol. Glad I am not aiming for perfect. Just aiming for a kid that has some respect and is not “entitled” to everything like most kids these days.

    • SummersGroovyMom says:

      Lol. Thank you for the share I also loved your “10 DIY Home Improvement Ideas” so much I had to pin. :) Thank you for the comment.

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